Chapter Text
Listen Tommy wouldn't say he's a good person. If people before hadn't already made that abundantly clear. That doesn't mean he thinks he's a bad guy, he's just having some hard times lately considering things. But now he thinks the universe is out to get him. Lately he's been trying to settle down now. First getting killed from his abuser when he was trying to get closure? Yeah shit. Then after that being in the void with his insane brother. Once again not ideal.
Then coming back, once again SHIT. People seeing him as something not real or as an experiment, shit. His bestfriend not viewing him the way, what do we say once again? Now the worst one yet is the fact that somehow his insane brother has been revived. He's been trying to let go of his past of lately. Seems as though the past says differently.
Listen, before when Wilbur and him were in the void the man very clearly denied something as a familial bond. But now he's apparently all he has left? He can't really tell if Wilbur is lying to him. He can only assume so but it's been something he had be longing for someone to say. For someone to notice how much pain he has been in. It's something during exile that he had wished for.
Someone now finally cares, even if it may be fake. He however still isn't completely blind to the things around him. He knows Quackity isn't a good person, that's for sure. Even if he hates dream he can admit what Quackity was doing was wrong. It just reminds him of what dream had done to him. He's also aware that Wilbur has not changed. It may seemed like he had from an outside perspective, but underneath it's all still lies.
Tommy has once again seemed to ended up in a shit interaction. He also seemed to between all of that.
Tommy was glancing between Wilbur and Quackity. Wilbur seemed to had been pissed of when he was denied entry into Las Nevdas, and when he was. This then dissolved into arguments. When they were fighting over where Tommy would be better at. He tried to ignore it but it was clear when they were across lakes yelling at each other.
Tommy's eyes were darting between the both of them. His breathing picking up when they continued to argue. He was trying to drown it out but he could still hear it. Hear them yelling at him about what the other was trying to do to him. His eyesight was blurring, he can't tell if it was from tears. Yelling lately has ticked him off somehow.
He covered his hears still trying to drown out the memories. Drown out the memories of Doomsday. All the yelling. People crying. Withers flying everywhere. Laughing coming from above.
He could hear someone trying to speak to him.
"Tommy, look at me." fury visible in Wilbur's eye.
He didn't really have a choice.
"You can't go with him," his face feigning sadness, "You're all I have man."
It made his heart break because even if he was lying, he still cared for Wilbur. Before he could dwell on it Quackity started yelling again. As did Wilbur.
That's how the rest of the day went. Them trying to convince to him who he should stay with. After a while they left. Wilbur saying that he had to go to Philza. Quackity saying something about a new recruit. Leaving him once again all alone.
The rain was pouring down, the stars having a slight glow to it. Adding to the already somber mood that was there. It was something that had been happening more lately. Being stuck with his thoughts, something that he didn't really prefer. He even had his jukebox outside. His disc playing. It gave a different feeling that it had before. It just reminds him how much he went through for it. He didn't know if he meant it in a good or bad way.
As he stared at himself through the water reflection he couldn't recognize himself. His hair having a white streak. A scar across his nose, from dream. One at the bottom of his face from the final battle he had with Technoblade in SMP Earth. A showing of all his failures. The permanent scowl that was on his face. Not that it mattered, everyone these days had one.
The rain was picking up now. Almost painful. There was something coming down his face also. He couldn't really tell if it was the rain or him crying. He could hear thunder in the distance, something that he would usually care about. He sometimes comes into moods where he can't find it himself to care. A specific memory when Niki and Jack were trying to kill him.
The stars seemed brighter tonight. Something he always took notice in. They were a constant in the SMP. Always there no matter what. There when he was exiled and no one was there. There was also Clara, he wondered how she was doing. He didn't really care if she was a hallucination it was something he could remember clearly. Conversations blurred with her, except for a few.
"I'm stuck here."
"That sucks.."
"It's fine, I'm one with the stars."
"What does that mean?"
"..."
Insignificant conversations that somehow at the same time were so significant. Sometimes he thinks he could still see her in the stars.
Thunder struck right next to him snapping him out of his thoughts. He grimaced before pulling his disc out of the jukebox. That had been too close for his liking. Quickly gathering items that were soaked from the rain.
Running quickly through the woods. Being agile and ignoring the fallen logs. Agile was something that he learned during the firs war. Something that stuck with him. Thunder once again struck behind him. He finally ran out and came across a flat flower field. Shit wasn't this supposed to the one place you don't want to be in a thunderstorm?
He didn't notice when but something struck him, turning his vision white. Something that felt horrid. The pain immense. Spreading all throughout him, the feeling being burning. He can actually recognize this. His thoughts all over the place but one in particular stood out. Lightning strike.
He then felt the feeling of peace. Something he wasn't accumulated with. When opened his eyes he noticed he was floating. He couldn't hear anything. He supposes that happens when you are in space. Fucking space. He could still however still breathe. This was not the afterlife. He could remember his clearly, it was just a black void. It had been hell.
His thoughts came aside when he saw something walking towards him? He couldn't get his mouth to work. He could finally recognize the thing he was looking at.
It was Clara that much was clear. Her hair was flowing and had a certain glow to it. There also seemed to be stars in her hair? She was wearing a white flowing dress. With the veil over it which looked like stars once again. Now that he noticed her whole outfit seemed to scream something about "stars." He saw her headband being like stars across it. The last thing he noticed was the somber feeling surrounding her.
He couldn't say much as she gave a small smile. The words barely able something he can comprehend. The area around glowing once again. This time just getting brighter. Becoming blinding in a way.
"I'm sorry little one," there was a pause, "But you deserved better, and better you shall receive."
He didn't know what that even meant because he felt himself moving. Like in the way you die but without the soul being ripped apart. This time it felt like someone was carefully untangling it. Something that was still weird but he much preferred this.
Then all of the sudden something sucked him back. It was so automatic that he didn't have much time to react. Then of course he recognized himself hitting the ground.
"Ow, the fuck?" he questioned trying to open his eyes.
After about a few minutes of trying to stand up and open his eyes he managed to do it. The first thing he noticed, was that he was in a forest? There was an odd deja vu feeling he couldn't place. He kept looking around as if something would stand out to him.
Was he even in the Dream SMP. Was just far away from spawn. Actually, he couldn't remember much at all of what had happened. He remembered getting struck by lightning. Wait what? Anyway....he'll open that can of worms later.
There was something lighting up on the side of his wrist. It looked like a wristband? He touched it before the front of his face was filled with color. A hologram appeared in front of him. There was multiple people on the map.... he wasn't aware this many people were in the SMP.
The sudden feeling of dread hit him. Because he did actually recognize this. But that would be impossible? He looked at the map and had to stop himself from crying. Because this was shaped as Earth.. As in SMP Earth.
Oh fuck.
So Tommy did the only thing he could do, he fucking screamed.